freedom

13 July, 2015  by

Free Will – How Free Are We?

What is free will? Is it the freedom to do as you will? This is what is implied. Does this mean we are free to flout the laws of the land? Obviously not, so there goes a bit of freedom. Or does it? Do we need to flout the laws of the land? Probably not. So is that now freedom reclaimed?

On a physical level free will does not really mean so very much. It’s a term, a theory, rather than a reality. Most people are driven by the demons of their childhood conditioning, and the emotional baggage they incarnate with, so any action resulting from this conditioning is certainly not free will. It’s not so easy to recognise free will, or to actually experience it.

So physically, free will is more a perception than a reality. How about the freedom to believe whatever we will? Do we have this?

Actually, if you have any beliefs from your childhood, teen years and as an adult, no, you have taken on a whole boatload of other peoples’ beliefs and made them yours. There’s nothing free about this! Consider your religious beliefs; if you are Anglican, then that is the basis of your spiritual beliefs – no freedom there. Catholic, Buddhist, Seventh Day Adventist, Baptist, Mormon, Fundamentalist, Muslim, these and a whole lot more are all religious beliefs that you inherit or accept with the religion. No free will at all. Generally, we grow up with our parents’ beliefs until, as adults, many of us attempt to get rid of them. Reaction, no free will here! Reaction to anything means no free will. Reaction is the abdication of freedom. Reaction is fear based, coming from the past; no freedom in this. It would seem that free will is rather difficult. Do you have the free will to stop thinking for one minute? Yes, you have the free will to try, but very few people have freedom from their own negative thoughts for more than a moment or so! You have the freedom to speak truthfully all the time, but do you do this, or is the price of such a freedom too high?

Free will, even mentally, is a nice concept but seldom a reality.

How about emotional free will? Sorry, but that is surely the most impossible of all. I facilitate 5-day intensives in a number of countries every year, and I have yet to witness what I consider to be true emotional free will. Nothing about us gets to be more conditioned than our emotions. We either suppress or deny them. Our reactions are usually more emotional than mental, even though thought precedes emotion. Emotionally, we are a very needy species, and abysmally poor at sharing our true feelings with each other. Do we have the free will to talk to people on the street, and say positive or loving things to each other? Well, we actually do have the free will to do this, but we are too inhibited to do it. Public speaking is considered one of our greatest fears. Why? Because we fear rejection and ridicule. This is automatic, no freedom of choice. Of course, we can overcome this, but most people never do. Anger is not emotional free will; it is emotional reaction.

Sorry, we are too emotionally conditioned for emotional free will.

So, the very idea of truly free will is getting bashed around a bit! Surely, we actually do have free will. We know that governments do not like us to have too much freedom of any sort, apart from conceptual freedom. We have a press that attempts to direct and control our thinking; we have politicians who attempt to convince us that their clever lies are actual truth. Every politician knows that it is not the truth that is important; it is our “perception” of the truth that matters. We are pushed and pulled mentally and emotionally by methods of advertising that use mind control; in fact, we live in a world that actively discourages true free will. We live in a world where consensus reality says, “My will be done, not yours. The only free will you have is what I allow you.”

Modern society is more about controlled will than free will.

One of the most common human conditions I encounter is self-criticism. A word about this; Oneness means all life is connected. Physics talks of the web-of-life; same thing. What this actually means is there is nothing outside Self. I do not mean the identity self, but the metaphysical Being you truly are. So in reality, whoever or whatever you criticise, it is you that receives its sting. If it is nasty negative criticism, it is you the venom poisons. Consider the boomerang principle; whatever you put out comes back. In essence, “all” criticism is self-criticism. Very few people can find the free will to end self-criticism. So much for free will! But it is possible. I do not criticise myself, although I used to, very heavily so. Self-criticism causes anxiety and depression, leading to heart disease and failing health, yet even this is not enough for us to find the free will to stop. Why not? Because our will is conditioned, not free. It’s the same with self-judgement, along with its old friend self-comparison. So many people bestow these conditions on themselves, knowing that it is to their overall detriment. Why? It makes no sense. Where is the free will to simply stop doing it? Why do we indulge in negative self-destruction? Whatever happened to free will?

Free will is not doing too well, is it? What free will?

Okay, enough; it’s time to showcase true “free will.” But let us be very clear about this, free will is a demanding choice. Yes, you can find the freedom to choose your thoughts, but it is not easy. Simple, but not easy!

First and foremost, free will demands that you live consciously. What’s that you say, you do live consciously? I doubt it. Most of the world’s population lives subconsciously between roughly ninety-three percent of each day. This means you! Think about it for a moment. Living subconsciously, you do not have free will. For better or worse, you are living from a program of the past . . . and it’s mostly worse! The good news is that, just occasionally, you indulge in original thinking, and the suddenly freed will suggests that it would be a good idea to erase the program of control. The moment passes, the program reasserts itself, and you decide that you will do it – tomorrow. And we all know that tomorrow never quite arrives!

Is it your free will in action when you decide to follow your “own” spiritual path? Or is this your long ago soul choice coming into its time? It is your conditioned subconscious program that causes you to procrastinate along the path of life. We really do sabotage most attempts we make to think freely, without any bias. Thinking freely does not mean thinking in the way we were taught at school, nor does it mean getting stuck in left-brain dominant thoughts. It means to allow your brain to   become attuned to a higher energy, while new and creative thought flows through the brain’s receptive centres. Usually, we churn out thoughts from the transmit centre; seldom are we receptive.

I have found, oddly, that it takes great self-discipline to cultivate free will, yet you eventually reach the place where free will is disciplined by no discipline at all. I did say that it’s odd! It would seem that you have to battle the mind to gain the freedom to think positive selective thoughts, but this is not so. By battling the mind, you create the very opposition that you are battling. This is not the way. As I have said, it is required that you live consciously. Be aware of your thoughts, observe them rather than censure them. Once you have established a pattern of being conscious, you will find that by focussing on the elevation of your thinking, rather than allowing thoughts to go their own capricious way, your thoughts and thinking will become more free, more receptive, revealing insights into life and living that cause the heart to sing.

To truly exercise free will, your whole body, your whole Beingness, is, as it were, more fine-tuned than anything you have ever known. You begin to experience a freedom you had never imagined. Mostly – and we can all slip – you are able to respond to life’s situations, rather than react. Fear reacts, Love responds. Fear comes from the conditioned past, while Love comes only from the moment. When you respond to life, you find that this is a more joyous way to live, and the brain actually likes it, releasing the appropriate ‘happy’ enzymes and hormones to share its pleasure with the body. Mind you, this is whole-brain activity, not left-brain dominant.

The actuality of free will is very different from the concept of it. To actually live from free will becomes a bit of a joke. You ask yourself, just who does this free will belong to? Does it belong to me, the identity, as my own choice? Or, does it belong to a higher aspect of me that I call Self, and this so-called free will is actually the will of Self. And you ask, did I learn or find free will, or has it always been here… just out of reach. Have I gained free will because I have submitted to Self, and if I did this, just how free is my will?

Did I choose my spiritual path from free will? Did I unwittingly and unrelentingly put myself through so much pain and suffering to become enlightened from free will? Or, did the will of Self, the Being I am, re-assert itself at the most appropriate time in my present incarnation?

If life has taught me anything, it is that true free will is freely living from the will of Self. And the will of Self is spiritual growth. So free will is more of a surrender than an acquisition. I surrendered to a higher will than the will of my identity-self; the will I surrendered to is the will of the immortal Self I am.

I have played with the subject of free will and I have enjoyed it, but I have not written my words frivolously. I have presented what I consider some serious food for thought. Maybe I have shown you a good reason to surrender your free will to the freedom of will that is already awaiting you. But, you still have to get past that conditioned program!

Never mind  – If I can, you can. Remember, you can only do it consciously!

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Author: Michaels J. Roads – Wake Up World

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9 April, 2015  by

8 Things Emotionally Stable People Don’t Do

“I don’t want to be at the mercy of my emotions.  I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them.”
―Oscar Wilde

  1. They don’t take other people’s behavior personally.

It’s easy to feel unloved and unwanted when people aren’t able to communicate and connect with you in the way you expect.  And it’s so hard not to internalize that disconnection as a reflection on your worth.  But the truth is, the way other people behave and function is not about you.  Most people are so caught up in their own problems, responsibilities and struggles, that the thought of asking you how you’re doing doesn’t even cross their mind.  They aren’t being mean or uncaring – they’re just busy and a bit self-centered at times.  And that’s OK.  It’s not evidence of some fundamental flaw on your part.  It doesn’t make you unlovable or unworthy.  It just means that some people aren’t very good at looking beyond their own egocentric bubble.  But the fact that you are – that despite the darkness you feel, you have the ability to share your love and light with others – is an incredible strength.

  1. They don’t get caught up in petty arguments and drama.

Being strong and emotionally stable doesn’t mean you have to stay and fight all the battles and petty arguments that come your way.  It means just the opposite – you don’t have to stay and respond to other people’s rude remarks and unnecessary hostility.  When you encounter someone with a bad attitude, don’t respond by throwing insults back at them.  Keep your dignity and don’t lower yourself to their level.  True strength is being bold enough to walk away from the nonsense with your head held high.

  1. They don’t just react (they respond mindfully).

A reaction is a hot, thoughtless, in-the-moment burst of emotion that’s usually driven by our ego (we’re more likely to react when we’re disconnected from our rational mind).  It might last just a split second before our intuition kicks in and offers some perspective, or it might take over to the point that we act on it.  When we feel angry or flustered after dealing with a situation or person, that’s a sign we’ve reacted rather than responded mindfully.   Responding mindfully will leave you feeling like you handled things with integrity and poise.

  1. They don’t get stuck thinking the world is ending.

Sometimes the darkest times can bring you to the brightest places, your most painful struggles can grant you the greatest growth, and the most heartbreaking losses of relationships can make room for the most wonderful people.  What seems like a curse at the moment can actually be a blessing in disguise, and what seems like the end of the road is actually just the realization that you are meant to travel a different path.  No matter how difficult things seem, there’s always hope.  And no matter how powerless you feel or how horrible things seem, you can’t give up.  You have to keep going.  Even when it’s scary, even when all your strength seems gone, you have to keep picking yourself back up and moving forward, because whatever you’re battling in the moment, it will pass, and you will make it through.  You’ve made it this far, and you’ve felt this way before.  Think about it.  Remember that time awhile back when you thought the world was ending?  It didn’t.  And it isn’t ending this time either.

  1. They don’t tie their present emotions to past negativity.

When we’re in the ‘here and now,’ it’s much easier to cope with emotions and see them as just that: emotions.  If we get caught up obsessing over the past, emotions and situations can take on new (and untrue) meanings as they become attached to stories.  For example, imagine you just got turned down for a new job.  Naturally you’re disappointed.  But if you’re not present with that emotion, and instead try to act like a tough girl or guy by burying it, the mind delves back into your past for all the other times you’ve felt that way.  Now you feel like a failure and you start to carry a feeling of unworthiness into every future job interview.  When we stay present, we’re empowered to start fresh every moment and we can see every situation with a sharpened perspective, which allows us to grow beyond the negative emotions (and outcomes) standing in our way.

  1. They don’t try to escape change.

Sometimes, no matter how uncomfortable it makes us feel to admit it, there are things in our lives that aren’t meant to stay.  Change may not be what we want, but it’s always exactly what’s happening.  The Earth does not stop spinning.  And sometimes saying goodbye is the hardest thing you will ever have to do.  Or, saying hello will make you more vulnerable and uneasy than you ever thought possible.  Some changes are almost too much to bear.  But most of the time, change is the only thing that will save your life and allow you to dream and grow and succeed and smile again.  Life changes every single moment, and so can you.

  1. They don’t try (or pretend) to be perfect.

Despite what others may tell you, you can disappoint people and still be good enough.  You can fail and still be smart, capable and talented.  You can let people down and still be worthwhile and deserving of love and admiration.  Everyone has disappointed someone they care about at some point.  Everyone messes up, lets people down, and makes mistakes.  Not because we’re all inadequate or inept, but because we’re all imperfect and human.  Expecting anything different is setting yourself up for confusion and disappointment.

  1. They don’t spew hate at themselves.

When you catch yourself drowning in self-hate, you must remind yourself that you were not born feeling this way.  That at some point in the past some person or experience sent you the message that something is wrong with you, and you internalized this lie and accepted it as your truth.  But that lie isn’t yours to carry, and those judgments aren’t about you.  And in the same way that you learned to think negatively of yourself, you can learn to think new, positive and self-loving thoughts.  You can learn to challenge those false beliefs, strip away their power, and reclaim your self-respect.  It won’t be easy, and it won’t transpire overnight.  But it is possible.  And it begins when you decide that there has to be a better way to live, and that you deserve to discover it.

Closing Thoughts

Looking after our emotional wellness helps us get the very most out of life.  When we feel emotionally stable, we feel more centered and connected to our intuition.  We become more productive, better at making decisions, more present, and more fulfilled.

So now that we’ve covered eight big “don’ts,” let’s close with a few rapid-fire “do’s” to improve your emotional stability and wellbeing in general…

Do… understand that the problem is not the problem – the problem is the incredible amount of over-thinking you’re doing with the problem.
Do… realize that just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.  Just because it’s easy, doesn’t mean it’s worth your while.  Do what’s right in life, not what’s easy.
Do… know there’s a big difference between empty fatigue and gratifying exhaustion.  Life is too short.  Invest in the activities you deeply care about.
Do… admit when you are wrong, and then embrace the fact that you are wiser now than you were before.
Do… say “no” so your yeses have more oomph.
Do… be so busy loving the people who love you that you don’t have time to worry about the few people who don’t like you for no good reason.
Do… focus more on being interested than being interesting.
Do… express gratitude and think about how rich you are – your family and friends are priceless, your time is gold, and your health is true wealth.
Do… realize that if the grass looks greener on the other side, it’s time to stop staring… stop comparing… stop complaining… and start watering the grass you’re standing on.
Do… be old enough to appreciate your freedom, and young enough to enjoy it.
Do… see transitions in life as the perfect opportunity to let go of one situation and embrace something even better coming your way.
Authors: Marc and Angel / Successful Flow

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